Hello Blogging World...
I have to add a little thank you to all of you for sharing and supporting every move I have made towards the blog and the changes during my life from month to month! The continuous support has been incredible!
What with sharing; couple blogs, to breakup blogs and then the transition towards being focused and motivated on following my career... Not forgetting, the constant growing of my beauty and fashion blogs!
I also know how important lifestyle blogs are to you all too! With knowing how important they tend to be, that's why I try to focus on what I can and can't share with you all! Timing, definitely plays a major part on blogging as bloggers all know when we can and can't share specific subjects...
So once again thank you for waiting!...
Anyway, I'm going to cut that short before I start rambling on...
I never normally post blogs like this but with recent events it's made me aware of how important it is to share your personal experiences if you know people will benefit from your answers etc.!
I couldn't but help post this blog due to the amount of comments and questions I have had sent to my email or through my social media pages. It's important for me to remind you all that, I read every single comment and email... Every single comment I receive is appreciated and with the growth of the blog I couldn't appreciate your responses anymore than I do! Knowing that little blog posts I share with you have a difference on your lives make me feel truly special!
Flashing back to when I first started the blog, my soul aim from the beginning was to know that potentially my words could help others. With now knowing that through your comments, I truly couldn't ever achieve anything better than that! Helping others is always a great achievement!
I've merged a few of your questions together and selected certain ones that I think you'll benefit from... Although, hopefully in the foreseeable future I will share a similar blog which will reflect different questions etc.! So fear not, if your questions aren't there as I will make sure there's a little section added!
1) How did it feel growing up not knowing a parent?
In different circumstances, every situation like this will feel different and I can't stress enough how important it is to remind you all!. If there's a reason for why your parent isn't around it's easier to understand to some degree.
For me personally, I grew up with a really solid and loving family. I was always encouraged how my father was a good man and in the future if I wished to pursue a relationship then I would have the backing from my family... (Having a positive reaction is always important!)
In all honesty, I grew up not really wanting to question why my father wasn't around. We all deal with emotions differently and that's certainly a major factor...
Of course, there were the questions in the back of my mind wondering where he was and why I didn't hear from him? But growing up with that in your mind isn't always something you want to admit or even open up and say those questions out loud.
2) How have you dealt with meeting your parent since?
At the moment, I personally have the feeling of not knowing whether it has hit me! I imagine, that this is a normal feeling as it's a massive change during your life! Emotions will be all over the shot...
But honestly relax.
Take things at your pace.
3) What were my first reactions after meeting my dad?
Honestly, I was shocked. I was completely shocked. I see myself like my dad in so many ways, after now spending just under three months of getting to know my dad I can pick up on certain similarities. But I was truly shocked.
Before, meeting my dad I wasn't actually sure if I wanted to pursue seeing him and building a relationship with him. By the time, I met my dad for the first time, with the accompany of my best friend and a few other friends, I knew my decision was to work on building that relationship and then to build a relationship with my other family members.
Again, I can't stress how important it is to take time for yourself and your feelings.
You must remember, your feelings are important! Be selfish, focus on yourself and how you feel. Don't rush!
It's also okay to not know how to feel. It's a massive decision.
4) How did I deal with my feelings?
Sometimes, you may feel a little bombarded and need some time to yourself in order to adjust to change! Or to even allow yourself to know there will be changes in your life!
You shouldn't ever feel like your blamed.
Sometimes, things happen in life and it's important for your parents to protect you.
My mum and my family members made the best decision she could for me and my future and important to remind you all that at no point should you point the finger and blame others.
Life is a journey for everyone and I personally believe we all have our own pathways... One way or another we all will take the pathway that's destined for us!
I must admit I'm not sure if I have truly dealt with all of my emotions yet. However, having the support from your friends is one hundred percent needed! As you know Lizzie and Charlie have played a massive part in helping me with meeting my family etc! I think they've become part of the family too ha-ha!
I found myself taking myself to my bedroom to listen to music or attempt to read a book to use as a distraction. Distracting yourself from facing too many emotions may be what you need!
Although, I of course bombarded myself with more work as usual!
Allowing time for yourself is the most important thing!
For me personally, without having Charlie or Lizzie I really doubt how I would've coped. Knowing I had you both there, really helped me to deal with my emotions. It made me feel more relaxed and stronger.
Meeting my family has truly been amazing.
With the support of my family too I've been so grateful!
Even though, I've found myself shutting myself in my room and not feeling very talkative.. When I've felt the need to speak, it's been incredible!
'Have You Grown Up Not Knowing A Parent Or A Side Of Your Family?...'
I've been incredibly lucky to find my father alongside my brothers... cousins.... grandparents... step-mum... auntie's.... uncles..... Is there anybody else left to mention, I'm feeling exhausted already ha-ha!
I've been lucky to find a part of me that I want to know and grow with...
In many cases there are situations where the children have been glad to not want to know their other side of their family... If you have felt like this or been put through a situation like this then please do feel free to contact me as I would happily spend my time discussing how I could help you etc!
There isn't always a sunshine at the end of the rainbow, so it's important to reinforce how my situation may not be exactly like yours... I wouldn't want to fill you all with false hope. I'm souly aiming to share reassurance with you all.
As it's your life to discover! It's your pathway to follow!
I'm now at the age where my parents had me and I believed it was the right time for me to discover my other family members.
Finding my father, has been incredibly emotional and amazing. I must admit, I thought it wouldn't go as well as it has done so to insinuate that I have been taken back a little is an understatement for sure.
My tips for you all is to follow your pathways.
It's okay to not want to pursue a relationship with family members that haven't been around for you. You must remember that if you feel uncomfortable or you find the situation too stressful then it may not be for you. It may not be the right time for you either.
Allow yourself to grow, allow yourself to find the right timing and follow your journeys!
Thank you mum for bringing me up the way you have, as you've made me strong and determined! I am so proud of you and how open minded you have made me towards growing as an adult.
My other top tip, for those of you who are balancing meeting new family members and keeping close with your present family members is to tell them the truth. When you're feeling super stressed out admit how your feeling even though it's hard. Otherwise, your family members may feel a little left out or even left behind.
If you have any comments, questions or more tips ... Then please feel free to leave them below or email them through to me!
Also if you have any stories for me on how you met your siblings or parents for the first time then I would love to hear them!!
I hope I have been slightly helpful!
I'm now feeling very zzzzzzzzz - I feel I should end the blog and head straight to sleep! Although, we all know my social media awaits me ha-ha!
Thank you for allowing me to share my blogs like these with you all!
I love every second of sharing emotional and lifestyle blogs with you as you have nothing but honesty and clumsy moments shared with you all!
It's time to sleep now zzzzzzzzzzzzzz!
With Lots of Love,
x
